so much blood (II)

so much blood
now the mosquito
has been crushed
suddenly
i see my future returned
a little tainted‌

Shared with MindLoveMisery’s Menagerie, where our task was to write about a desperately sad time in our lives – in either shadorma or shadorma summation.  The first poem is a shadorma which is a rewrite of the original tanka shared here.  Which do you think is stronger?

2 thoughts on “so much blood (II)”

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